Category: Discipleship

How to be a valuable Christian

I am delighted to welcome Liz Carter onto my website today, with a guest post as part of the blog tour for her fantastic new book Valuable. I was thrilled to read an advance copy of it, and delighted to endorse it too. The book shares such a vital message to us all – I thoroughly recommend it to you.

I was really sick again. I’d been prayed for so many times through my life of illness, and I had not been healed. I was still in pain. Somebody in the group prayed for me with these words: ‘Father, please heal Liz so she can be useful again. So you can use her again.’

I felt like I was falling apart as those words churned in my mind. Useful again. Useful. Useful. It seemed to me that in order to be useful to God I must get better, and because I wasn’t getting better, I was useless. I was not valuable to God. I went out of that meeting with my head hung low and my heart heavy. Would I ever be of use to God? Even when people told me God could use me I couldn’t make those words mean good things for me. I couldn’t be used, because I wasn’t well enough. And did I want to be used, anyway? Was being used by someone a good thing?

Let’s look at the words we use

Language is so important, and as Christians we sometimes forget this and we use words and phrases that some might call ‘Christianese’; incomprehensible to the world around us. When we talk in terms of being useful to God, or of God using, people on the outside of faith may look on and raise their eyebrows at the idea that ‘God using’ is positive language. After all, when we talk about a guy using a woman, we don’t mean it in a positive way, do we? We mean he has used her for his own ends. So why do we talk about God like this?

It’s one of those things that we think must be in the Bible, but when we look into it it actually isn’t (a bit like unhelpful phrases like ‘God helps those who help themselves’). The verb ‘to use’ with us as objects and God as the user just doesn’t appear anywhere at all. There are some great pictures about us as honoured vessels, created by God for good purposes, but not to ‘be used’ by God. What if there is a different way of thinking about how God works in us and through us – a way that more accurately describes the love-relationship God longs for with us and has created us for?

What God values v what society does

God’s kingdom is an upside-down kingdom. While the world values productivity and usefulness, God values us for who we are: his beloved children. We do not have to earn God’s love, and we are not God’s tools, picked up and then discarded when the job is over with. Instead, God partners with us and joins with us (John 15) and is delighted in us (Zephaniah 3:17). In God’s economy, we are all loved and all equal (Galatians 3:28). The picture Paul shared of us all being equal parts of the body of Christ (1 Corinthians 12:27) was astoundingly radical and counter-cultural in a time where power was valued and the weak were thought of as lesser. It still speaks to us today in a society where ‘doing’ often seems to count more than ‘being’.

Even in church we can find this narrative has taken hold: we see how the useful, the strong, are valued above the weak, and so people who are weak can feel lesser. It plays into the way we talk about healing, too, as I said at the start: somehow we have come to believe that healing and ‘wholeness’ will make us more useful to (and used by) God. Somewhere along the line we have forgotten that God is not interested in how much we do, but in how much we love him and how much we respond to his transformative grace and power. For a disabled, chronically ill person like me, this is so liberating: I am found in Christ and freed in Christ, not for how much I do but for who I am created to be.

So when those kinds of prayers are prayed over me, I am free to say no, I do not need to be healed to be useful to God. I find God working in me and through me within my pain, and I do not have to always be trying harder, or getting better, or striving away to earn my place in God’s kingdom. I’m so grateful.

Knowing your value

My new book, Valuable: Why your worth is not defined by how useful you feel digs into these ideas and reflects on our stories in God, stories of his infinite love over us rather than stories of how useful we are to him and to those around us. It is my prayer that as you read it, you will find yourself set free from the narrative that you are not enough, and be assured that you are of more worth than precious gems.

That you are valuable.

Liz Carter is a writer and poet from Shropshire, UK. She is the author of Catching Contentment, Treasure in Dark Places and Valuable. You can find her on Twitter @LizCarterWriter, on Instagram, Facebook and TikTok @greatadventureliz, or at her website.

Labyrinths

I am delighted to welcome Fay Rowland to my blog, as part of the blog tour for her new book 40 Days with Labyrinths. Here she explains what labyrinths are, why she loves drawing them and how you might like to utilise the labyrinths she provides in her book.

I launched my book at the beautiful Launde Abbey in Leicestershire. If you have a chance to visit Laude, I heartily recommend it as it is a place of peace and beauty, where 900 years of prayer have soaked into the very stones and give off a timeless scent of serenity. They also do fabulous cakes!

One of my favourite parts of Launde is the large grass labyrinth behind the kitchen garden. It’s based on the famous design in Chartres Cathedral, and it’s a delight to see it changing with the seasons.

Labyrinths explained

A labyrinth is different from a maze, although they look similar. A maze is a puzzle that tries to trap and confuse you. It has dead ends and wrong paths and you have to battle the maze and try to beat it. A labyrinth is entirely the opposite.

A labyrinth has only one path, which twists and turns, but always leads to the goal. Because of this, a labyrinth guides and relaxes you. You cannot make a mistake and you cannot get lost. Walking a labyrinth is similar to the soothing rhythm of knitting, as the path leads to and fro and you do not have to worry about where to go next; just follow the path and trust.

Utilising labyrinths in our spiritual lives

This aspect of labyrinths makes them an excellent model of the Christian life, where we cannot determine what the future may hold, but we can trust that God know what he’s doing and walk life’s labyrinth path in his company.

When full-sized labyrinths are not available, drawn ‘finger’ labyrinths are perfect for slowing down and giving ourselves the excuse to spend some time resting in God’s company.

The idea behind my book

I love to draw labyrinths. The act of creating the patterns is very restful, and afterwards I can trace the path with a finger or with colouring pencils and pause at the turns to breathe and reflect – a soothing walk with God. The above picture is a watercolour I made of Launde Abbey’s labyrinth and it was as much a delight to paint as to walk. Labyrinths work especially well with the intricate ‘zentangle’ designs you often see in grown-up colouring books.

I had the idea of combining my love of drawing labyrinths with gentle Bible reflections, allowing people to ponder as they ‘walk’ or colour the drawings. The lovely people at Darton, Longman and Todd have done a fabulous job of making the idea a reality.

Engaging with the labyrinths in the book

The book has 40 short Bible readings groups into topics (eg Bread, Water, Home, Wonder) each with a reflection and short prayer. They’re all written in accessible, relevant language that echoes the hopes, doubts and concerns of real people living real lives. The readings are accompanied by hand-drawn labyrinths, including the popular Celtic knot designs, traditional ‘classical’ labyrinths that have been drawn for thousands of years, and contemporary patterns designed especially for this book.

There are also suggestions for how you might like to walk the labyrinths, although there is no ‘right’ or ‘wrong’ way. Some people like to pause at the turns and say a short prayer; perhaps a line of The Lord’s prayer or a short phrase such as ‘Come, Lord Jesus’. Another way is to imagine placing your guilt and regrets along the path – you could draw them if you wish – and reaching the centre as John Bunyan’s Pilgrim, free of your burdens. Ask God’s forgiveness and walk back out of the labyrinth, leaving the rubbish at the side of the path. Or, very simply, you can use the labyrinths as an excuse to sit in stillness for a while and ponder the passage or listen to God – busying your hands to still your mind.

Fay Rowland is a mum and mathematician, Trekkie and theologian, scientist and sewing ninja. She writes intergenerational Christian resources, including a number of books, and her interests include the overlap of science and faith, children’s spirituality and beautiful algebra. She lives in the English Midlands with her pet dragon.

To find out more about Fay, and read more from her, visit her website.

More spiritual practices for this year

Over the last few weeks, we’ve begun to look at spiritual practices that we can incorporate into our daily lives, starting with lament and how we can utilise the psalms when we need to lament ourselves. I want to round off this mini series by looking at a few more spiritual practices I have found useful over the years.

Simple one-phrase prayers

This practice is so easy to do as it really is as simple as praying a short phrase. This actually came out of a challenge that someone in the small group I was in at the time shared with us, and I have found myself coming back to it again and again in recent years. We were encouraged to pray these two simple phrases at different points: “Order my day” and “What’s the one thing?” For someone prone to self-sufficiency, the very simple act of praying “order my day” reminds me that God is in charge of my life. As I pray I sometimes visualise taking my hands off the steering wheel and allowing God to sit in the driver’s seat.

The idea of asking God to help us focus our day helps bring order – for those of us with too much to do in a day and feeling overwhelmed, but also for those for whom days stretch out endlessly and we feel lonely – asking God for that one thing he wants us to focus on brings a clarity, a focus and a closeness to him.

I have also found offering up my daily ‘to do’ list to God, and asking: “What’s the one thing you want me to focus on today?” helps me to lay all those things I might think are important before him, actively seeking what his priority is for my day. I have seen him open up some unexpected opportunities to help others that I believe I would have missed otherwise.

One word

Another ‘one’ that I’ve incorporated into my year since 2017 now, is prayerfully choosing ‘one word’ that I feel God wants me to be the focus of my year. It is a really helpful practice and, while I know many people will already have their word for the year, if you haven’t chosen one yet, do take a look at this blog where I explain how I choose my word, over on the Premier Woman Alive website.

Lectio divina

Finally, I want to share how life-enriching I have found lectio divina – in fact, the book club I run usually engages with a lectio at the start of each session and we have all come to enjoy the chance we have to slow down and really engage with the text, and with Jesus.

Lectio divina is a Latin term meaning ‘divine reading’. It is a traditional Benedictine way of reading scripture, giving time and space to really connect with it. In the 12th century the Carthusian monk Guigo II formalised the approach into four steps: read, meditate, pray and contemplate. The emphasis is on lingering over a passage and allowing it to affect us. It isn’t about theological study; rather it is about encountering Jesus and allowing him to speak directly to us. This approach can be done with any portion of scripture.

Utilising lectio divina

Pick a portion of scripture then use the following steps:

1. Read: Sit in a comfortable chair and relax. Take time to slowly read your chosen verses, paying attention as to whether a particular verse or phrase jumps out.

2. Meditate/Reflect: This time when you read the passage, focus particularly on the phrase (if you have one). Rather than analysing its meaning, ask Jesus what he wants to say through it. Are there any insights he wants to share with you from this passage and/or phrase?

3. Pray/Respond: Read the passage again then offer up all your feelings and responses to God in prayer. Ask Jesus for guidance on how to pray as necessary. Journalling can be helpful too. Be open to any changes that God may be instigating. This is where you can start a dialogue with God.

4. Contemplation/Rest: After a final read through of the passage, sit before God in silence. The emphasis here is on ‘being’ rather than doing.

Lament in our everyday lives

Last week, we looked at how the Bible is full of lament and God invites us to lament in our everyday lives. The practice helps us to cling on to God and, as such, is a hope-filled action. We are now going to take a closer look at psalms of lament, and how we can utilise them in our own lives.

I don’t relish the experiences that have revealed how vital lament is to me, but I do cherish the renewed understanding that God has given us permission to vent all our anger, frustration, anguish, as well as our questions. I have come to view lament as part of my survival kit.

Lent is fast approaching: this is a time in the Church calendar where we traditionally wrestle with that ‘in-between’ time of confusion and bewilderment. The disciples watched all their hope seemingly die with Jesus on the cross and on that day and Easter Saturday there is often space held to consider our own despair, before the celebrations of Resurrection Sunday.

Psalms of lament

The pandemic has brought suffering to so many families, and this life is full of troubles (as well as joys). If you don’t regularly practise lament, perhaps you could take time this Lent to explore the subject more fully and think about the different ways you can utilise the practice in your own life.

To begin with, you could try finding a psalm that seems to echo the cry of your heart and turn it into a prayer – or write your own lament.

Let’s look more closely at a psalm of lament, to see the four stages that they often (but not always) work through:

Address: the psalmist speaks directly to God, often revealing a level of intimacy in the relationship.

Complaint: Laying out the questions and anguish in a raw, totally honest way.

Request: Putting a direct request to the One that they know can help.

Expression of trust: Often the psalmist remembers God’s past faithfulness and turns to worship, declaring their trust in God.

You can write your own psalm according to these stages, or try using them as a basis for prayer. We will look at ways of doing both here.

Example: Psalm 13

This short psalm shows the four stages very clearly.

Address: How long, Lord? Will you forget me forever?
Complaint [God far, enemies triumphing]:

How long will you hide your face from me?
2 How long must I wrestle with my thoughts
    and day after day have sorrow in my heart?
    How long will my enemy triumph over me?

Request [more personal ‘my God’]:

3 Look on me and answer, Lord my God.
    Give light to my eyes, or I will sleep in death,
4 and my enemy will say, “I have overcome him,”
    and my foes will rejoice when I fall.

Statement of trust [and praise]: 5 But I trust in your unfailing love;
    my heart rejoices in your salvation.
6 I will sing the Lord’s praise,
    for he has been good to me.

Psalm as a springboard for prayer

Here is an example of the way in which I use particular psalms as launchpads for my own prayers, utilising Psalm 13 again:

1 How long, Lord? Will you forget me for ever?
    How long will you hide your face from me?

God I can’t see you at work in this situation. It feels like I am having to cope on my own. I know you are there – please reveal yourself to me. Show me you haven’t forgotten us.
2 How long must I wrestle with my thoughts
    and day after day have sorrow in my heart?
    How long will my enemy triumph over me?

This all feels relentless, and it does feel like the devil is having a field day. I am finding it hard to keep batting away the discouragement, and my own depression. How long is this going to go on for Lord?

3 Look on me and answer, Lord my God.
    Give light to my eyes, or I will sleep in death,
4 and my enemy will say, ‘I have overcome him,’
    and my foes will rejoice when I fall.

We need you to move – we need release! Come and act, move so that those around will know that you are God. And bring me your discernment and wisdom to know what to do – and your energy. I am so tired Lord…

5 But I trust in your unfailing love;
    my heart rejoices in your salvation.
6 I will sing the Lord’s praise,
    for he has been good to me.

I do trust you Lord, however hard that is to say at times – and I do know that you are good and that your character cannot change. I also choose to worship you, singing songs of thanks, because I know they stir my heart and do me good. Thank you for the salvation you have brought me, thank you for the way you have led me in the past – and thank you for the way you have upheld my family. I know that you love them more than I do – and trust that you have a hope and a future for each one of us.

Writing your own lament

Here are some questions to help you if you would like to try writing your own lament psalm. Use the suggestions, if helpful, in order to be honest before God but also meditate on the fact that God is with you in all your troubles or simply begin to allow God to minister to the hurting parts of your soul.

• Start by thinking about what difficulty – circumstance, person etc – is causing you anguish/anger/ anxiety/pain. Write out a description, and also how you feel about it – try and name the emotions.

• Do you feel that God is with you in it, or do you feel that he is absent? Try and write out where you feel God is.

• To help you with the second half of your lament, brainstorm some characteristics of/truths about God that you know in your head (even if you don’t feel them in your heart currently).

• Remind yourself of some of the ways God has shown his faithfulness to you in the past.

Use the notes you have made as a starting point to write out an honest lament. Try and end the psalm with some positive statements of trust – even if you aren’t feeling them right now.

Choosing to be honest before God

There have been moments in recent years when the extraordinary depths of pain and grief have wracked my body and soul, and I have been unable to do anything but sob my heart out. But I have had to make the choice to either do that before God, or trying to hide from him. In all honesty, there have been moments of both – although I know he always sees us. But when I have come before him I have certainly felt less alone. It is lament that has helped me to do that. Ultimately, I know God is good and would never want to go through any of this without him – lament helps me to hang on to him. It is certainly a practice I wouldn’t want to be without in my everyday life now.

Spiritual practices for this year

I had a wonderful time sharing at a local women’s group this last weekend. We looked at some of the spiritual practices that have helped me hold on to God during a particularly difficult few years. In this mini series, I am going to share some of that material with you. I hope and pray that there is something that you would like to try out in your own life.

Why spiritual practices?

I don’t know how your year has begun, but I have to say for my family and I it was nothing like we expected! My husband is the pastor of our church and, while we had a quiet Christmas, we had a busy weekend of New Year’s celebrations planned – a church party New Year’s Eve followed by a café-style church brunch service the following day. When I started feeling ill towards the end of the previous week I didn’t think too much of it – until I got really quite poorly. I was shocked when my Covid test was positive – I hadn’t had it at all up until that point.

So I spent the whole weekend and beyond isolating. When a new year comes round, many people – myself included – take the opportunity to look back over the previous year (although it took me a few extra days before I could get started on this), to thank God for all the good things and let go of the bad, and also resolve to go deeper with him in the next year. Perhaps Bible reading has become lax or there are other ways we haven’t done as well as we could – and we ask for his help to do better. But while Paul does talk about training like an athlete in 1 Corinthians 9 I think we can falsely believe we need to do certain things in order for God to love us. That’s just not right. If you know you can fall into that mindset, take a moment now to simply be in God’s presence, and be aware of his love for you.

I do think we’ve all been affected by the pandemic and January is a good time to refresh our spiritual lives anyway, in terms of what we do regularly to keep ourselves spiritually fit. It can sometimes feel like a new year stretches out before us, full of unknowns, but spiritual practises help to ground us, and draw us closer into God’s presence. I’d like to share about some perhaps lesser known (or at least lesser spotlighted) spiritual practices, which have held me during a period when I simply couldn’t do much more than get through each day.

Introducing lament

The Bible is full of lament, and it is an important way of processing difficulties. Lament simply means crying out to God, presenting our requests to him and sharing with him our pain and anguish.

Each one of us will face disappointments (such as being let down by those we love, hurt by the church), bereavement, negative circumstances that may be the result of our own sin or someone else’s. And many of us will face intense suffering, such as physical pain and/or mental ill health. 

Jesus himself said: “In this world you will have trouble. But take heart! I have overcome the world.” (John 16:33). So why do we find it so difficult to accept that? And why do we seem to be ill-equipped to deal with it in a healthy way? How do we take heart?

Life is hard – we do have the promise that one day: ‘He will wipe every tear from their eyes. There will be no more death or mourning or crying or pain’ (Rev 21:3-4) but, until then, God doesn’t expect us to hide our difficulties away. 

In fact he ensured that the songbook created for his people the Israelites contained plenty of examples of how to express the pain we feel in our difficulties. They actually sang laments together as a corporate body using these psalms. And we also have the books of Job and Lamentations.

Throughout the Bible we can see many examples of tears alongside prayers – including Jesus’ example in the Garden of Gethsemane – lament is very much a part of the biblical narrative. 

Our need to lament

God invites us to voice our struggles because he knows that if we don’t express our laments, we can become totally consumed and distracted by them – or ignore them, which can result in physical ailments as the emotional pain has no other way of being expressed and we are total, whole beings – our spiritual, physical, emotional beings all tied up and affecting one other.

I first connected with the psalms of lament in a time of intense pain and sin in my own life (which I talk about in my book Taking Off the Mask). When I read the words ‘My wounds fester and are loathsome because of my sinful folly. I am bowed down and brought very low; all day long I go about mourning…I am feeble and utterly crushed; I groan in anguish of heart’ (from Psalm 38:5–6,8) it was like the writer was describing exactly where I was at, and it helped me to reach out to God while I was in such turmoil.

Back then, it was a revelation of my own sinfulness and the resulting pain that caused me to lament. But in more recent years, it has been a cry from deep in my soul that has been almost unstoppable. It has become a way I have desperately tried to remain connected to God through circumstances that have threatened to engulf me or those I dearly love. Some days it can sometimes feel like all hope is lost – and yet lament is the bridge that helps me find my way back to God when he seems distant or hidden. Lament is, ultimately, hope-filled. It helps us to vocalise our determination that, despite circumstances that are totally bewildering, we refuse to turn away from our heavenly Father. We know he is good and has understanding way beyond ours. And so we can pour out our anguish and tears, alongside our praise, before him, knowing that he sees, hears, understands and is with us.

Next time we will look at how we can utilise psalms of lament in our everyday lives.

Unmasking Christmas: Find your way to hope through honesty, gentleness and joy

Photo by Tessa Rampersad on Unsplash

It is my absolute delight to welcome Abby Ball to my website today, as she shares how we can ‘unmask’ Christmas to find hope. This guest blog comes as she launches her latest book, Contemplating Christmas. I am thrilled to have endorsed it as it is such a refreshingly honest read that I would encourage you to get hold of for this Advent (I have included my endorsement at the bottom). So, over to Abby…

The Christmas adverts have been with us for weeks now, and they are very good at reminding us what Christmas is meant to look like. There’s supposed to be a happy family who loves spending time together in a beautifully decorated house. There’s meant to be a delicious feast, with an enormous pile of gifts under the tree. Everything is supposed to be sparkly and merry and fun. 

But what if it’s not? What if you’re facing difficult family issues? What if you’re living with grief and Christmas highlights your heartbreak and loss? What if you’re living with a chronic illness that won’t take a break for the holidays? What if you’re already overwhelmed, worn down and weary before the season has even fully begun? What might Christmas stories have to offer those of us who are hurting, exhausted and in despair?

I’d like to suggest three invitations, or practices, the Gospel stories offer us when things are hard, to help us find our way back to hope.

Be honest

With all the cultural expectations of happiness and fun that surround Christmas, it can be easy to pretend everything is OK, even when it isn’t. We can be tempted to put on a mask, fake our smile and act like we’ve got it all together. But the nativity stories of the Bible don’t do this. Luke’s Gospel opens with the painful story of Elizabeth and Zachariah’s long-term infertility. Then we hear about Joseph, who faces the heartbreak of thinking his fiancée has cheated on him. Still later in the story, we encounter the mothers of Bethlehem, whose babies have been murdered by the evil Herod. 

These are very personal, very painful stories and the Bible makes room for them. It doesn’t gloss over them or pretend they didn’t happen and God isn’t asking us to do that with our pain either. If you’re struggling this Christmas, you don’t have to pretend. Find a trusted person and tell them how you really are. Just saying those words “I’m not OK” can bring us a small measure of relief. 

Be gentle

This time of year we remember the way that Jesus, who was fully divine, fully God, came to earth and was born as a tiny baby. Jesus began his life on earth in exactly the same way we do. He was totally helpless and vulnerable, completely dependent on the care and kindness of his parents. This story of God-become-man helps us to understand that being vulnerable and having needs isn’t weakness, it’s just part of what it means to be human. Jesus had the same needs as we do: the need for food, shelter and warmth; the need for rest, safety and affection; the need for meaning, purpose and relationship with God. 

Of course, as we grow up, we take responsibility for meeting our own needs. But be very gentle with yourself, and remember that it’s OK to ask for help. It’s OK if you haven’t got it all together and can’t do it all on your own. It’s hard to be vulnerable and admit to our own needs sometimes, but having needs is part of what it means to be fully human. 

Find joy

Sometimes it feels like joy is beyond our grasp. We want to feel happy but we’re still waiting for our big breakthrough, or changed situation. And sometimes joy can even feel inappropriate in the midst of so much suffering and grief in the world. 

But I think joy is closer that it might seem. There are big celebratory moments in the Christmas stories, but there are quieter ones, too. I think about the quiet moments between Mary and Jesus. I think about the shepherds, contentedly tending to their sheep. I think about light shimmering from that bright star leading the wise men. 

Joy was never meant to invalidate, or erase, our sorrow, but it can help us carry it with more ease. It can help us to find delight, even in the midst of what’s hard. Joy dares to believe there are good, beautiful things worth celebrating, and that suffering isn’t the end of our story. Advent is a great time to lean into small joys because there are so many of them around! The taste of a mince pie, the sound of a favourite carol, the sparkle of fairy lights or the tiny glow of warmth from a lit candle. Use your senses and see what small delights the day might hold for you.

A genuine hope

We can find hope this Advent through being honest, being gentle with ourselves and finding small moments of joy. It’s a genuine hope that doesn’t ask us to pretend, and doesn’t leave us to struggle along on our own. At Christmas we remember that Jesus is Immanuel, God with us, and he can make all things new.

Abby Ball was a primary school teacher for many years and now works as a freelance writer. Her work has been published in Fathom Mag, The Mudroom and Teach Primary. She lives in the UK with her husband, Tim, and their cat, Otta. Find more of Abby’s work at abbyball.substack.com, or on social media @abbyballwrites

Here is my endorsement of Abby’s book: ‘Abby has a beautiful, poetic style of writing that draws the reader in immediately. She has also managed to create a refreshingly different Advent devotional that is honest about the struggles and difficulties of life, but also invites us to push past the consumerism and cultural expectations of the season to draw closer to Jesus – even in the midst of our questions and hurting. Her reflection questions are insightful, helping the reader to really think and apply what they have been reading about, and the breath prayers are wonderful, easy takeaways to use throughout the day. This is a rich resource that offers a gentle yet powerful accompaniment to Advent.’

I have a series of blogs on hope on this site. For a sample of one click here.

Celebrating the Queen’s life: 5 ways she inspired me

It was with great sadness that I, along with you all, heard of the Queen’s passing yesterday. As we take time to mourn our loss together, whatever our feelings about the monarchy, let’s acknowledge that the Queen was a solid, faithful figure, always there. Most of us haven’t known a time when she wasn’t on the throne.; it will take some getting used to not having her around. The media is, quite rightly, full of stories about her life and reign. Many Christian leaders have written tributes noting the role that her faith had. I certainly admired the way she spoke increasingly of Jesus in her Christmas messages. 

Here are some of the things I have learned from the Queen’s life, which I hope to incorporate in my own – and gently encourage you to consider for your own life too. May we be able to say, as she did in her Christmas speech in 2002: ‘I know just how much I rely on my faith to guide me through the good times and the bad. Each day is a new beginning. I know that the only way to live my life is to try to do what is right, to take the long view, to give of my best in all that the day brings, and to put my trust in God!’

1. Have a servant heart

Even six years before her coronation, the Queen spoke of serving others in a speech to the Commonwealth on her 21st birthday: ‘I declare before you all that my whole life whether it be long or short shall be devoted to your service.’ It is indisputable that the Queen’s reign was hallmarked by sacrifice and a servant heart. In John 13 Jesus blew his disciples’ concept of his ministry out of the water when he took a towel and a bowl of water and began to wash their feet. They were aghast but he said: ‘I have set you an example that you should do as I have done for you’ (v15). Are we willing to serve others, even when it may be uncomfortable or put us out?

2. Keep showing up

There must have been times when the Queen would rather have had a duvet day than undertake the duties that had been arranged for her, and yet she remained steadfast and faithful. Even during her husband’s funeral, which I’m sure would have been far easier away from public scrutiny, she sat alone, masked. What a poignant image of a faithful public figure, following what were the current social distancing guidelines in the pandemic, even in the midst of her grief. So many shared that image when the news broke of the unlawful social gatherings in Downing Street.

Our integrity as human beings matters and, like the Queen knew, our actions are being watched. We are being ‘read’ and, when we show up faithfully even in those moments that perhaps we don’t feel like it, those around us see. While others in a position of leadership may abuse it, the Queen didn’t. Whether we are leaders or not, let us be faithful and steadfast in what God has put before us each day.

3. Don’t be afraid to speak up

The Queen’s Speech in more recent years had a more defined reference to her faith, which was noticed. Back in 2017, The Guardian said that of her by then 65 annual Christmas speeches, 17 referred directly to her Christian faith. She explained how it was ‘the anchor in my life’ (in 2014) and in 2016 said: ‘Billions of people now follow Christ’s teaching and find in him the guiding light for their lives. I am one of them because Christ’s example helps me see the value of doing small things with great love…’ In 2000 she used her speech to describe Christ’s life and teaching in detail, saying they ‘provide a framework in which I try to lead my life’.

While we may not have the opportunity to give speeches that are broadcast to millions, we are urged in scripture to: ‘Always be prepared to give an answer to everyone who asks you to give the reason for the hope that you have. But do this with gentleness and respect’ (1 Peter 3:15). In this day and age, when people are ‘cancelled’ for holding an opinion different to the crowds’, there is a cost attached to doing this. But as Christians we are called to be different, and to count the cost (Luke 14:25-33).

4. Be honest

I personally found it refreshing when the Queen did not shy away from referencing difficulties in her family. For example, in 1992, a year that saw a fire destroying part of Windsor Castle, three of her children divorced and ongoing scandals surrounding Princess Diana and Prince Charles, she described it as ‘annus horribilis’ in a speech. While not commenting directly on events, she was not afraid to be honest about finding the year difficult.

Too often we can pretend that life is fine – even think that that is what we should do as Christians – and yet the truth is we need to be honest, and to find ways to process our pain well. Jesus himself said: ‘In this world you will have trouble. But take heart! I have overcome the world’ (John 16:33). We can and should acknowledge the difficulties, speaking up rather than stuffing down our pain. But, ultimately, we can take heart from knowing, as the Queen did, that Jesus is our ‘anchor’.

5. Ask for support

During her coronation speech, the Queen referenced asking the public to pray for her on her coronation and beyond: ‘that God would give me wisdom and strength to carry out the promises that I should then be making’. While she was absolutely resolute in her sense of duty over her long reign, she understood right at the start that it was a huge undertaking that she couldn’t do in her own strength. Knowing that God’s ‘power is made perfect in weakness’ (2 Corinthians 12:9), she reached out to him for strength, and asked others to uphold her in prayer as she did so. We each need that support as the body of Christ (1 Corinthians 12:12-31).

We are made for community and function best when we are connected, holding one another and each doing our part so that others can flourish too. While it can be a natural human tendency to hide away when we are struggling, it is so important to speak up when we feel we need extra support. Let us be gentle and supportive of one another, too, as we navigate this time of national mourning.

This article was first published on Christian Today’s website.

Mental Health Awareness Week

It is Mental Heath Awareness Week and I just couldn’t let the week go by without posting. I want to firstly acknowledge that I have struggled with my mental health in the past. And, due to a mixture of grief, stress and perimenopause, know I am again now. While there is much less stigma surrounding this issue, I am heartbroken to see how stretched the services trying to support people’s mental health are. I am particularly aware of how much the pandemic has affected the mental health of our young people.

Being community

The theme of this year’s Mental Health Awareness Week is loneliness. With a teenager about to embark on GCSEs, I understand how the isolation of being home-based, studying, can cause feelings of loneliness. Young people need our prayers for their mental, emotional and physical wellbeing during this season.

There are so many others who face loneliness on a daily basis. As my husband takes time today to make some pastoral visits, I am reminded of how vital it is that we are in community. I realise it is more difficult with the fragmented, busy lives so many of us live in 21st-century cities. But the benefits far outweigh the costs – for all involved. Let’s pray for those, like our pastors, street pastors, food shop volunteers and other community workers as they reach out to the lonely. Let’s also think about ways that we can too.

It’s OK to ask for help

I know that when you are struggling it is natural to want to hide. It takes huge courage to reach out – and yet it is as we do so that we make human connection, which is so good for our wellbeing. We need to make it as easy as possible in our communities and churches for people to share their needs. Let’s work hard to cultivate safe spaces where people understand it is OK not to be OK – where no one feels judged but rather heard and supported.

Useful links for mental health awareness week

There have been some really helpful articles and posts during Mental Health Awareness Week. Here are a few useful links:

https://www.facebook.com/mindandsouluk The Mind and Soul Foundation have been posting really helpful advice on their Facebook page this week.

https://www.eauk.org/news-and-views/what-could-a-mental-health-friendly-church-look-like?fbclid=IwAR2ONmQJHnuGcf-Z_QaRkzLRT0QP9QyMDMfHwamAe2Wz2dnEhziecEcr_68 Rachael Newham from brilliant mental health charity Kintsugi Hope on how churches can be more supportive.

https://www.facebook.com/KintsugiHope Kintsugi Hope have also been posting tips for loneliness. Also included is a video from founder Patrick Regan on his own struggles, how he felt such shame to begin with but has come to understand that people with anxiety are some of the most courageous and faith-filled.

You can also find some links to helpful books here.

The Last Supper

Image by Gini George from Pixabay 

Maundy Thursday is traditionally when we take time to consider the Last Supper, Jesus’ last meal with his disciples. These reflections are based on Matthew 26:17–35.

Preparing the Passover meal for the Last Supper

The Passover meal was part of the Festival of Unleavened Bread, which commemorated the Israelites’ exodus from Egypt. There would have been thousands more people in Jerusalem for this festival: Jesus’ disciples ask him where he wants them to prepare for their celebrations and, much like we saw on Palm Sunday, here there is another instance of him directing them to a person who will give them everything they need – as well as another indication that he is conscious all the time of what is about to happen.

The Passover lamb

Once alone with his disciples, during the Last Supper Jesus tells them about what will happen shortly. He indicates Judas’ betrayal, and the fact that he is about to shed blood and have his body broken. His disciples are confused, but the timing of this is not insignificant. The Passover meal remembers the time when the angel of death passed over the homes of the Israelites who had smeared their door frames with the blood of a sacrificial lamb (Exodus 12); Jesus was about to become the ultimate Passover sacrifice.

A lonely path

Jesus’ disciples are adamant that they will stick by him, but he knows the truth; one by one they will desert him after his arrest – even Peter, who protests the loudest. How it must have made Jesus’ heart heavy to contemplate the path of lonely sacrifice he was about to tread. Sometimes I wonder whether there are ever times when we, too, say that we are loyal to Jesus but our actions seem to show otherwise.

Prayer

Jesus I thank you that you were willing to become the ultimate Passover lamb. Help me to remain faithful to you in all areas of my life.

Palm Sunday

Palm Sunday photo by Brady Leavell on Unsplash

Today is Palm Sunday, a celebration of when Jesus rode into Jerusalem on a donkey. My reflections are based on Matthew 21:1–11.

Fulfilling prophecy

Jesus knew that this was the last time he was going to enter Jerusalem before his arrest. It must have been quite sobering to know that he was getting ever closer to that moment. He still took the time to attend to details that he knew were necessary in order for him to fulfil Old Testament prophecies. This included, for example, sending two of his disciples to fetch a donkey for him (v2). He says to the disciples to simply let the owner know that the Lord needs them – the mention of his name was all the authority they needed. Matthew is the only gospel that includes both donkey and colt in his retelling, but this directly reflects what the prophet Zechariah said, which we can see in v5.

A statement of who Jesus was

What is amazing about this episode is how the crowds gather as soon as they see Jesus approaching. They spread out their cloaks and branches on the dusty road and praise him as he rides past. It is one of the few places that we see Jesus being publicly honoured and recognised. How sad that it was only a few days later that the same people would desert him. I’m sure many would have been in the crowd that called for his crucifixion too…

By entering Jerusalem in this public way, Jesus was declaring who he is (the messiah, heavenly king). But he was doing so with humility (on a simple colt rather than with great pomp and ceremony). Even so, this episode seemed to wake the city up to his presence. In verse 10 we see that everyone was ‘stirred’ and asked who Jesus was. I wonder how often we celebrate Jesus in such a way that those around us ask about him?

Palm Sunday reflection

The crowds threw down palm branches and cloaks to welcome Jesus into Jerusalem. How can you welcome Jesus into your life today? And how will you ensure that yours is not a fleeting welcome, as theirs was?