Category: Discipleship

Exploring the Daily Examen

2 Comments

The Daily Examen may sound intimidating but I have discovered that it is an amazing – and simple – way of connecting with God. Here I share how I first came across it and how I have come to value it.

Practising the Daily Examen allows you to evaluate your day, and God’s presence in it.

It was reading the Sensible Shoes fiction series that compelled me to try some spiritual disciplines for the first time. The series is written by Sharon Garlough Brown, and tells the story of four women who attend the same spiritual formation group at a retreat centre. Sharon is a spiritual director herself, and manages to weave into the women’s stories ways to connect with God deeply during everyday life. As the women are introduced to new spiritual practices by their course facilitator, so too is the reader as Sharon provides instructions for each one. It was in her books that I first discovered the Daily Examen.

The origins of the Examen

Ignatius of Loyola developed the Daily Examen in the 16th century. He believed it was a gift from God to be utilised twice daily (at noon and at the end of the day). It focuses on prayerfully reflecting on the day’s events to discern God’s presence and his will for our daily lives.

My experience with the Examen

As someone who usually sets aside time with God in the morning, it was interesting to switch to the end of the day, looking back over its events. I was particularly intrigued by a quote from the character and course leader Katharine: ’Pay attention to your strong reactions and feelings, both positive and negative. The Spirit speaks through both.’ I have certainly found that to be the case. While I don’t utilise the Examen every day, I have found it to be an enlightening and enriching experience.

Using the Daily Examen

It can be helpful to view the Examen as a way of sitting with Jesus and talking through what happened during the day. It is about slowing down to pay attention to the details of our lives, which we might otherwise overlook. Therefore, you might find it helpful to visualise snapshots of your day in your mind.

  1. Be still and become aware of God’s presence. Ask the Holy Spirit for guidance and begin looking back over the day. It can be helpful to clarify times of being particularly aware of his presence. Were there any times when he seemed absent?
  2. Review the day with gratitude. Thank God for any of the special gifts he provided, looking out for the smallest details such as interactions with friends, food, nature.
  3. Pay attention to your emotions. We can detect the presence of God in our emotions, so it can be helpful to think about when you felt most alive and energised, and when we felt drained or anxious. Where there times when you resisted God? Why? God may bring to mind things that need confession, and, once you have done that, you can receive his grace and forgiveness.
  4. Concentrate on one feature of the day. There may be something that seems to be particularly highlighted – perhaps because God wants to teach you something. It could be positive or negative; the important thing is to stay with it, and pray as God leads.
  5. Look forward to tomorrow. You can take the lessons from one day into the next, bearing in mind how you have responded and worked with the Holy Spirit today. If there are any challenges you know you will face tomorrow, prayerfully bring them before God before asking for hope and a sense of his love.

Reprinted with permission from Premier Woman Alive magazine, copyright Premier Christian Communications Ltd 2022, all rights reserved. womanalive.co.uk  

This is part of a mini series on spiritual disciplines. To read about choosing a word for the year, click here.

Jesus’ humanness

Photo by Hussein Altameemi from Pexels

I am delighted to welcome Jo Acharya to my blog today, as part of the blog tour for her devotional book Refresh: a wellness devotional for the whole Christian life (Do check out the details at the end for your chance to win a copy!) Here, she invites us to take time to consider Jesus’ humanness and what impact it can have on our lives today. 

She moves lightly around the small room. The baby she holds against her shoulder is whimpering, and she talks to him in a lyrical voice as she pats his back. Eventually the child lets out a small burp, and she brings him round to face her. She smiles, cradling his head in one hand while she wipes the milky mixture from his tiny mouth with the other. And then she kisses his forehead and begins to sing, a version of the song that first flowed from her lips in the early days of her pregnancy: “My soul magnifies the Lord…”

Imagining Jesus’ everyday life

We could imagine many more vignettes like this. Perhaps Jesus’ legs repeatedly giving way when he first tries to stand as a toddler, or mispronouncing difficult letters in his early words. Perhaps Joseph teaching him to cut straight pieces of wood with a saw or Mary showing him how to knead bread. We might picture Jesus diligently memorising passages of scripture as a boy, or laughing and eating with his friends as an adult.

In a way these scenes are easy to imagine because we’ve seen them a hundred times. This is the everyday stuff of human life. But thinking of Jesus this way can be mind-blowing. That God himself chose to enter fully into this human life, even confining himself to a physical human body, is one of the greatest mysteries of the Christian faith. That he came to us as a helpless newborn baby, totally reliant on an inexperienced young woman to keep him alive and clean and well-fed, is even more remarkable.

When the ordinary becomes sacred

One of the central themes in my devotional is that when we invite God into the everyday stuff of our lives, ordinary things become sacred; from our relationships and emotions right down to our very bodies. In Refresh I look at the complex relationships we all have with our bodies, and how Jesus’ unpolished humanness gives extraordinary dignity and worth to our own.

After all, our whole lives are lived in and through our bodies. Like Jesus, we are all physical beings in a physical world, and we can’t do a thing without using some part of our physical form. God created us this way, and he called his creation good. Despite the sin, the sickness, the damage we have sustained in this fallen world, to be human is still a precious and miraculous thing.

What Jesus’ humanness means for us

I sometimes wonder when Jesus knew he was different. Was there a lightbulb moment, or was the knowledge of his identity always there, gradually coming into focus as his self-awareness developed? And then I think of his parents. How do you mother the Messiah? I imagine this simple couple, the carpenter and his wife, simply doing what all good parents do. Loving their children, passing on values and traditions, making mistakes, giving their best.

Jesus’ human life was a real human life. It wasn’t a pretence – he wasn’t an actor playing a role. He didn’t resent his humanity, he embraced it. Even after his resurrection, his glorified body was a glorified human body. This matters. It matters because being human is good, and we need to know that God is glad to share in our humanity with us. It matters because being human in a fallen world is hard, and we need to know that Jesus has experienced that too. And it matters because being human is a team effort. We can’t do it alone, and we don’t have to. You and I have a team-mate in heaven with God, constantly interceding for us. This is what Jesus’ humanity means. The burping baby, the unsteady toddler, the compassionate carpenter. The great King and High Priest who is able to empathise with you and me.

Free copy!

Jo has generously offered to give a copy of her book away to one of my readers (she will send it direct). In order to be in with a chance of winning, do sign up to my newsletter by filling in the form here (I promise not to bombard you – I send a newsletter out around once a term/quarter), or if you’re already signed up just drop a comment below.

Jo Acharya is a writer and music therapist. Her first book, Refresh: a wellness devotional for the whole Christian life is available from all good bookshops. You can read more of Jo’s writing and buy signed copies of Refreshat ValleyOfSprings.com, and you can follow her on social media at Facebook.com/ValleyOfSprings and Instagram.com/ValleyOfSprings.

A word for the year

I have the great pleasure of taking part in a mini series of blogs for Woman Alive on spiritual disciplines during January. The content will be reposted here, so that I can share what I have written with you. I hope the three blogs over the next few weeks are an encouragement to you.

In recent years, the idea of choosing a word for the year that is then focused on and regularly prayed into has become popular among Christians. The book My One Word (Zondervan), came from a challenge that one of the authors gave their church back in 2007 to ditch New Year’s resolutions and instead focus on a word that year.

Trying it out for myself

I am not one to jump on bandwagons, and actually avoided the trend to begin with. Then, at the start of 2017, I felt God impress on me that he wanted me to focus on a particular word in the coming year: ‘humility’. That word really stretched and challenged me in ways I couldn’t have imagined, which resulted in me working on my character. For example, I found myself in situations where I felt the need to ‘fight my corner’, and God stopped me in my tracks by simply whispering: ‘humility’. Rather than going off ‘all guns blazing’, I took the time to slow down and pray. I experienced peace as a result, and lost the overwhelming desire to react.

Since then, I can honestly say that the word for the year has become a great discipleship tool in my life. I have been surprised by the words that have come, and how much God has used them to shape me.

There have been years when the words have seemed strange – out of place even. For example, in 2020 my word for the year was ‘delight’ – by that February my mum had died and then the pandemic hit. I had to dig deep to find out what treasure God wanted me to learn about delight. I discovered that he wanted to teach me how to delight in him despite my circumstances, and meditate on how he delights in me. Last year my word was ‘rest’, and it was one of the hardest, most gruelling years I’ve ever had. I came to understand how God’s rest is necessary for survival rather than a nice optional extra within a busy life.

I don’t like doing anything under compulsion, so certainly wouldn’t want to add to a list of ‘ought tos’ in your life. However, I have found choosing a word for the year has been life-giving in so many ways, and would recommend you try it out.

Choosing a word for the year yourself

Each time I have chosen a word, I have simply prayed and asked God for a word. I have then taken a few weeks to see if the word that I sensed was in fact the right one. I have also prayed it through with close friends.

If you feel that you need step-by-step guidance, then My One Word provides clear advice on how to choose a word for the year. For example, it suggests that you pick a word that ‘centres on your character and creates a vision for your future’. The book takes you through the process of how to narrow down everything you want to achieve during the year into that one word.

Once you have a word, you may find it helpful (as I have) to let a few trusted friends know what it is so that they can be praying for you. You might like to invite them to ask God for a word for themselves too, so that you can be supporting one another. I hope and pray that you are blessed by choosing a word for this year.

Reprinted with permission from Premier Woman Alive magazine, copyright Premier Christian Communications Ltd 2022, all rights reserved. womanalive.co.uk  

Go gently

As a nation we have begun the journey out of lockdown and, hopefully, that will continue over the next month or so. There has been such a sense of anticipation, and quite a lot of excitement. People have enjoyed being able to meet up with others outside, and even enjoy a meal outside. However, it is so important to go gently.

THE IMPACT OF THE LAST YEAR

What we have been through during this pandemic has been huge – even if, like me, it hasn’t actually affected your day-to-day life as much as it has for others. As someone who already worked from home, my work didn’t really change. However, there was a lot more of it and I was interacting with others working from their homes rather than office spaces.

Even so, I am very aware of the emotional toll this year has taken on me. Feelings of overwhelm seem to strike regularly. Having researched and written articles on the emotional cost of lockdown, as well as having spoken to many others feeling similarly, it does seem that there has been a far-reaching effect that we are going to continue to experience the impact of for years to come. So again, please do go gently.

STRENGTHENED OR STRETCHED?

For those of us that are married – as well as those living with others – our closest relationship(s) will also have been impacted. Encouragingly, recent surveys suggest that many marriages have come out stronger. Couples have recognised the pressure and made a conscious decision to invest in the relationship and support one another well. But for others, the added stress of being with one another 24/7 has put a spotlight on underlying issues. If that is you, can I encourage you to go gently – but not to ignore what has come to light. Talk to one another, try and take positive steps to resolve conflicts – and pull in trusted friends if necessary.

And for all of us, let’s not rush to try and put this incredibly difficult year behind us. If we bury the hard emotions they will simply resurface in weeks, months or even years to come – and not in a good way. 

Go gently… on each other if you notice you have shorter fuses than usual

Go gently… if you notice one of you is feeling overwhelmed and you aren’t sure why

Go gently… if one of you is itching to begin socialising again and the other is reticent. Take time to talk it through – and go at a pace agreed by you both. 

There are many other scenarios I could have picked – but I hope you have the message by now. Please go gently, and take care of yourself and those closest to you.

NB If you feel you would like some additional resources for your marriage, our book Grace-Filled Marriage is publishing in just over a week – we’d love for you to take a look.

Being content

2 Comments

These reflections on being content are based on Philippians 4:10–13.

‘I have learned the secret of being content in any and every situation, whether well fed or hungry, whether living in plenty or in want.’ (v12)

I am rounding off our study on ‘Self’ with these verses because I think they are really encouraging – and challenging. Paul is saying that he has learned the art of being content, whatever the situation. I really feel that that is a place that God wants to guide us to as well. Can we truly echo Paul’s heart? And what about how we feel about ourselves?

LEARNING TO ACCEPT OURSELVES

It is so important to remember that we are works in progress. Yes, we are daughters of the most high King, and are redeemed and perfect in His sight. We are also ‘being transformed into his image with ever-increasing glory’ (2 Corinthians 3:18). There is a process involved; are we accepting of ourselves through that or are we highly critical and constantly longing to be someone we are not?* God accepts us exactly as we are, while continuing to mould and shape us through the work of His Holy Spirit. If He accepts and loves us at whatever stage of our journey we are in, surely we should too? 

SUSTAINED BY JESUS

Learning to be content with ourselves is a great springboard for us to then reach out to others and to embrace all that God has for us in this life. Sometimes that may include incredible opportunities that blow our mind. At other times it may involve difficulty and suffering. Through it all we can fix ‘our eyes on Jesus, the pioneer and perfecter of faith’ (Hebrews 12:2), He will sustain us with His strength throughout our lives if only we look to Him. It is through His finished work on the cross that we can cultivate a healthy sense of knowing who we are. In Him we can also learn to be content in our circumstances and love those around us**. 

Prayer: Thank You Lord for the reminder to love myself. I choose to fix my eyes on You today – help me learn to be content where I am currently. Amen.

* If you know self-acceptance is a something you struggle with, you might want to take a look at Insight into Self-acceptance.

** If you would like to explore the subject of being content further, I highly recommend the following books:
Liz Carter’s Catching Contentment (IVP) – Liz has also written a six-week Bible study course to accompany the book
Jennie Pollock’s If Only (The Good Book Company)

NB I have included links to the publishers of each book, but please do buy from your local Christian bookshop if you can.

An eternal perspective

Photo by Edu Carvalho, from Pexels

These reflections on having an eternal perspective are based on 2 Corinthians 4:7–18.

‘Though outwardly we are wasting away, yet inwardly we are being renewed day by day.’ (v16)

This extract from 2 Corinthians reminds us of the frailty of our bodies (they are referred to as ‘jars of clay’). I think we can place too much emphasis on our physical bodies. The fact is, each day we are getting older and our bodies are decaying as they age. That is part of the fallen nature of our world and yet, sadly, our society doesn’t value older women. The marketing we see all around us tends to set up young, beautiful women as the ideal.

A DIFFERENT SET OF VALUES

The underlying message is that we should try to make ourselves look as young and beautiful as possible – outer beauty is what it is all about. But that simply isn’t the truth and this passage reminds us that we have a different set of values to live by. In a society that bombards us with the opposite, I think we really need to be reminded of this eternal perspective. We also have a promise to hold on to: ‘our citizenship is in heaven… the Lord Jesus Christ… will transform our lowly bodies so that they will be like his glorious body’ (Philippians 3:20–21).

ULTIMATE HOPE

Paul describes the trials and sufferings that he endured – but defiantly states: ‘We are hard pressed on every side, but not crushed; perplexed, but not in despair; persecuted, but not abandoned; struck down, but not destroyed’ (vv8–9). He isn’t shying away from the reality, but he is stating where his ultimate hope is: ‘For our light and momentary troubles are achieving for us an eternal glory that far outweighs them all’ (v17). Is that how we view our difficulties? Do we think in terms of eternity? Is our sense of self reflecting our eternal inheritance, or simply our immediate circumstances?

Prayer: Lord I thank You for this reminder that, while my physical body may be fragile, I have an eternal hope in You. Amen.

Everything we need

These reflections on God giving us everything we need are based on 2 Peter 1:3–11.

‘His divine power has given us everything we need for a godly life through our knowledge of him’ (v3)

This is one of my favourite portions of scripture. We have already been looking at how God provides everything we need to truly be ourselves. Here we get an incredible summary of that fact! As we are getting near to the end of this devotional series, I wanted to include these verses as an exhortation to us all. They feel all the more poignant today, as it would have been my mum’s birthday. The passage speaks to me afresh of how God has everything I need for this season in my life. That is, for my grieving as well as every other area. But they also remind me of how well my mum made ‘every effort’ to grow in the qualities described – and spurred me on to do so too.

GROWING IN CHARACTER

It is precisely because God has given us everything we need, by allowing us to ‘participate in the divine nature’ (v4), that we are able to grow the qualities described here. These are character traits that enable us to be better people, more loving and more godly. But what is their purpose? ‘For if you possess these qualities in increasing measure, they will keep you from being ineffective and unproductive in your knowledge of our Lord Jesus Christ. But whoever does not have them is short-sighted and blind, forgetting that they have been cleansed from their past sins. (vv8–9). 

KNOWING GOD’S IDENTITY – AND OUR OWN

I find it fascinating that we are told twice that knowledge about God is essential (verses 3 and 8). For me, that reaffirms the importance of knowing who my God is – and who I truly am in Him. Without that knowledge, too easily we can fall for the lie that we can never be free from a particular sin or habit. Or the lie that we don’t deserve the salvation we have received.

When we are secure in God and our identity, we can put off what hinders us and, working with the Holy Spirit, develop ourselves further so that we reflect the nature of Jesus more and more. We can actively pursue spiritual maturity, living out God’s values in our daily lives.

Reflection: Reflect on what your life says about your faith. Does it reveal God’s kingdom…and are you growing? Finish by thanking God that He has given us everything we need to live out our lives well.

Accept one another

These reflections on learning to accept one another are based on Romans 15:1–7.

‘Accept one another, then, just as Christ accepted you, in order to bring praise to God.’ (v7)

We are continuing to look at how living our lives well includes reaching out to others. Here our focus is on humbly considering how well we accept one another.

FRACTURE OR UNITY?

I find it a sad indictment against the Church that there is so much infighting. Just a quick look on social media reveals many heated arguments, in which participants often angrily accuse others of not being real Christians. Tragically, the world at large can look upon so many parts of the Church and see fracture rather than unity.

In Romans Paul urges us to look to the needs of others. If we are stronger in a particular area than someone else, rather than looking down on them we should bear with them and encourage them. In all honesty, there are particular situations when this is more difficult. However, our motivation is always to be the same. We never deserved Jesus’ love and acceptance but He has poured it on us in bucket loads. So how can we withhold our love and acceptance from others?

LEARNING FROM BIBLICAL EXAMPLES

If you know you find it difficult to accept others, or if there is one person who is springing into your mind as you are reading this, be encouraged by verse 4: ‘For everything that was written in the past was written to teach us, so that through the endurance taught in the Scriptures and the encouragement they provide we might have hope.’

The Bible shows us how to love and accept others; it reveals God’s love for us and how Jesus was willing to be insulted for us – and ultimately die for us. It shows us the disasters that occurred when different people refused to accept one another (such as Cain and Abel, Saul with David). The Bible also shows us how God honours those who put their lives on the line for others (such as Esther and Ruth).

Prayer: Lord thank You for the reminder to accept those around me. Help me to share Your love today. Amen.

Gently instructing one another

These reflections on instructing one another are based on: 
Titus 2:1–6.

‘teach the older women to be reverent in the way they live… Then they can urge the younger women…’ (vv3–5)

The heart behind this passage seems to me to be all about the church family functioning as a supportive network, one helping another to live righteously. The emphasis is on self-control, but there is also an urgent call for sound teaching, purity, kindness, integrity etc.

LIVING AND TEACHING AUTHENTICALLY

I feel I need to be honest now and say that there have been moments in which I have found comments from older women difficult to take. These were often in the context of parenting when I had very small children. I found myself thinking that collective wisdom had moved on and the women were too old-fashioned in their opinions. I think I probably missed out because of my attitude, and know of others who longed to have such input when they were younger.

However, what still causes me to sit up and listen is when women have modelled something beautifully, and have also taken time to simply be my friend before speaking into my life. Often the subsequent teaching is done naturally – and it is that that I think Paul is referring to here.

In each example, he is urging the leader or older person to first live out the way they will then instruct others to. As long as that happens in an organic way, rather than one person lording authority over another, I think it is a wonderful picture of unity and support within the body.

LEARNING AND INSTRUCTING WITH HUMILITY

Our society often feeds us the lie that only we know what is best for our own lives, and it can harden us to input from others. If only we could be humble enough to both receive and give gentle instruction in order to build one another up and help each other live lives worthy of our callings…

Prayer: I am sorry Lord when I dismiss what others may try to teach me. Help me to be humble and gracious, and also to recognise when You want me to help someone else. Amen.

Stand firm

These reflections on how to stand firm are based on 2 Timothy 1:6–13.

‘For the Spirit God gave us does not make us timid, but gives us power, love and self-discipline.’

Paul wrote this letter to Timothy from prison, knowing that he was going to die soon. In it, he was encouraging Timothy to stand firm in the midst of difficulties, to ‘fan into flame’ (v6) the gift already inside him. It is obvious that Paul was enduring persecution for his faith. However, he knew Timothy’s leadership was also under fire. So he reminded him that he had all he needed.

All Christians, whether leaders or not, have the power, love and self-discipline that comes from the Holy Spirit. Those qualities help us to ‘guard the good deposit’ that we each have.

ENCOURAGED BY EXAMPLES

These devotional blogs are based on Bible study notes I wrote previously, and it was quite poignant for me to read who I mentioned in the entry about this scripture. I had been organising a women’s event called ‘praising through the pain’ and asked three women very dear to me to speak, who retained resolute faith through incredible suffering.

One of those was my dear mother, who, as I have shared many times before, endured so much physical suffering in her life. The others, too, have both encouraged me to stand firm through their own example. Paul was a great example to Timothy – who do you have in your life being the same for you?

GUARDING OUR HEARTS AND MINDS

Whatever we are facing we can stand firm in Jesus, and do not need to suffer shame – although we may endure difficulties. This passage reminds us of the truth and grace of the gospel. We may need to be bold, and fight against the schemes of the enemy at times. But we may also endure suffering for the sake of the gospel. Let’s remember we can call on the Holy Spirit to help us draw on the power, love and self-discipline He has already placed inside of us.

Prayer: Lord You have given me all I need to stand firm today. Holy Spirit, help me to avail myself of Your power, love and self-discipline. Amen.