Tag: character

A word for the year

I have the great pleasure of taking part in a mini series of blogs for Woman Alive on spiritual disciplines during January. The content will be reposted here, so that I can share what I have written with you. I hope the three blogs over the next few weeks are an encouragement to you.

In recent years, the idea of choosing a word for the year that is then focused on and regularly prayed into has become popular among Christians. The book My One Word (Zondervan), came from a challenge that one of the authors gave their church back in 2007 to ditch New Year’s resolutions and instead focus on a word that year.

Trying it out for myself

I am not one to jump on bandwagons, and actually avoided the trend to begin with. Then, at the start of 2017, I felt God impress on me that he wanted me to focus on a particular word in the coming year: ‘humility’. That word really stretched and challenged me in ways I couldn’t have imagined, which resulted in me working on my character. For example, I found myself in situations where I felt the need to ‘fight my corner’, and God stopped me in my tracks by simply whispering: ‘humility’. Rather than going off ‘all guns blazing’, I took the time to slow down and pray. I experienced peace as a result, and lost the overwhelming desire to react.

Since then, I can honestly say that the word for the year has become a great discipleship tool in my life. I have been surprised by the words that have come, and how much God has used them to shape me.

There have been years when the words have seemed strange – out of place even. For example, in 2020 my word for the year was ‘delight’ – by that February my mum had died and then the pandemic hit. I had to dig deep to find out what treasure God wanted me to learn about delight. I discovered that he wanted to teach me how to delight in him despite my circumstances, and meditate on how he delights in me. Last year my word was ‘rest’, and it was one of the hardest, most gruelling years I’ve ever had. I came to understand how God’s rest is necessary for survival rather than a nice optional extra within a busy life.

I don’t like doing anything under compulsion, so certainly wouldn’t want to add to a list of ‘ought tos’ in your life. However, I have found choosing a word for the year has been life-giving in so many ways, and would recommend you try it out.

Choosing a word for the year yourself

Each time I have chosen a word, I have simply prayed and asked God for a word. I have then taken a few weeks to see if the word that I sensed was in fact the right one. I have also prayed it through with close friends.

If you feel that you need step-by-step guidance, then My One Word provides clear advice on how to choose a word for the year. For example, it suggests that you pick a word that ‘centres on your character and creates a vision for your future’. The book takes you through the process of how to narrow down everything you want to achieve during the year into that one word.

Once you have a word, you may find it helpful (as I have) to let a few trusted friends know what it is so that they can be praying for you. You might like to invite them to ask God for a word for themselves too, so that you can be supporting one another. I hope and pray that you are blessed by choosing a word for this year.

Reprinted with permission from Premier Woman Alive magazine, copyright Premier Christian Communications Ltd 2022, all rights reserved. womanalive.co.uk  

Everything we need

These reflections on God giving us everything we need are based on 2 Peter 1:3–11.

‘His divine power has given us everything we need for a godly life through our knowledge of him’ (v3)

This is one of my favourite portions of scripture. We have already been looking at how God provides everything we need to truly be ourselves. Here we get an incredible summary of that fact! As we are getting near to the end of this devotional series, I wanted to include these verses as an exhortation to us all. They feel all the more poignant today, as it would have been my mum’s birthday. The passage speaks to me afresh of how God has everything I need for this season in my life. That is, for my grieving as well as every other area. But they also remind me of how well my mum made ‘every effort’ to grow in the qualities described – and spurred me on to do so too.

GROWING IN CHARACTER

It is precisely because God has given us everything we need, by allowing us to ‘participate in the divine nature’ (v4), that we are able to grow the qualities described here. These are character traits that enable us to be better people, more loving and more godly. But what is their purpose? ‘For if you possess these qualities in increasing measure, they will keep you from being ineffective and unproductive in your knowledge of our Lord Jesus Christ. But whoever does not have them is short-sighted and blind, forgetting that they have been cleansed from their past sins. (vv8–9). 

KNOWING GOD’S IDENTITY – AND OUR OWN

I find it fascinating that we are told twice that knowledge about God is essential (verses 3 and 8). For me, that reaffirms the importance of knowing who my God is – and who I truly am in Him. Without that knowledge, too easily we can fall for the lie that we can never be free from a particular sin or habit. Or the lie that we don’t deserve the salvation we have received.

When we are secure in God and our identity, we can put off what hinders us and, working with the Holy Spirit, develop ourselves further so that we reflect the nature of Jesus more and more. We can actively pursue spiritual maturity, living out God’s values in our daily lives.

Reflection: Reflect on what your life says about your faith. Does it reveal God’s kingdom…and are you growing? Finish by thanking God that He has given us everything we need to live out our lives well.

Moulded by the maker

Reflections based on Romans 5:1–5.

We need to be honest – there are times when we all struggle, when thoughts about hope are simply beyond us because we are totally overwhelmed and frustrated by our circumstances. God knows that, and shows us great mercy in our struggles. But He also works through our testing times, our waiting times, the times when we are forced to give up on things we thought we were supposed to be doing, are suffering physically or are being treated unfairly by someone around us.

Some of the things we find ourselves up against are a result of human sin – of those around us or perhaps ourselves – but, whatever the reason, God can use it all to mould our character. As this Romans passage says, we can ‘boast in the hope of the glory of God’ – but also ‘glory in our sufferings’ because they produce in us a harvest of perseverance, character and, eventually, hope.

Knowing that God is doing something through the hard times, moulding us to be more like Jesus, can help us to understand why He doesn’t always deliver us from them. Rather than just praying for an end to the troubles, have you ever tried asking God what He is trying to teach you, or change in you, during a really testing time?

Mick Brooks, in his book Faith, Hope, Love and everything inbetween (CWR), says: ‘Even though we sometimes don’t realise it, don’t feel like it’s true and even, at times, don’t want it, God is committed to finishing what He has started. He takes imperfect people and works constantly to transform us, using everything we go through as the tools of His trade.’ (p17)

In my own life, it is certainly true that I can look back and see how God has changed me through the struggles — although I couldn’t see it at the time.

For prayer and reflection: Thank You Lord that You have a heavenly, eternal perspective. So often I want to be released from particular difficulties and yet You allow them because they mould me. 

‘Let your gentleness be evident to all’

Wow. Sometimes it can be so hard when God starts pinpointing an area in your life that needs work can’t it? I’m exhausted, and the phrase ‘enough already’, which I used to talk about those things that crowd out God’s voice earlier this week, is something I’d like to shout back to God now! You see, I had a difficult conversation with a friend last weekend and was left out of sorts. I knew I had to talk to them again, but, when I did, even though I knew they were going to tell me I’d been harsh, I didn’t think I would hear the phrase ‘I certainly don’t expect to be talked to like that by anyone’. I knew I had some apologising to do, but it was such a shame – and such a lesson for me as a leader – because it clouded the real issues that were going on. I was trying to bring correction, and yet, in the end, in a way, it was me who was being corrected – at least in part. I of course fought it a little, saying things like ‘Well it only escalated like that because you fought back, saying you didn’t agree’ and, if I’m honest, I’ve come away pondering the phrase they used to describe me. I honestly and truthfully don’t think I was as bad as they made out, and I know we have certainly had those sorts of exchanges before because we are both fairly fiery and wear our hearts on our sleeves. But that isn’t really the point. And that riles me if I’m honest. Sometimes I think ‘why God?’ ‘Why pick on my faults and point out my wrongdoings when all I was trying to do was uphold your values in the first place?’ But then I have to realise, and accept (however begrudgingly!) that that isn’t the point, and the way I say things is just as important as what is said. And I also know that one of the things I found hardest about the whole affair actually showed up something lacking in myself.

Ever since that encounter I’ve had the scripture ‘Let your gentleness be evident to all’ going through my head. And part of me is allowing it to resonate in my spirit – while the other part is still longing to burst out and shout ‘it’s not fair!’ But I know this is such an important lesson for me personally that if I don’t grab this as an opportunity to grow and change then I will really regret it. Because it affects every relationship – with my husband, children, parents, friends, worship team members, general church members – everyone. Ever since I was a teenager I’ve had words spoken over me about the sharpness of my tongue; about how I need to learn to use it for God’s glory to cut through to the heart of things, rather than using it to hurt people. And I’ve had so many prayers prayed over me that I would learn to be more gentle. But, I guess if I’m honest, I’ve always seen gentleness as a bit of a weakness and, over the years, have accepted that I have a more fiery, quick-witted character. While I don’t think it is wrong, and still feel it is as God made me, not learning to rein it in and not cultivating the gentleness that is a characteristic of walking in the Spirit is wrong. I was struck by something that I read this week on the Gospel Coalition blog, which was written by a woman who lives in Dubai:

I find Peter’s exhortation about inner beauty in 1 Peter 3:3-4 both wonderful and very challenging. When I first read this passage I was struck by how many years I had spent desiring more physical beauty without a thought to inner beauty. My struggle is further compounded by the fact that I live in the consumer center of Asia, where only your outer self matters. A quiet and gentle spirit is often misunderstood to mean weak and timid. While this is a challenge, I am surrounded in church by women who are truly beautiful on the inside and whose lives are a wonderful picture of the gospel, and that really motivates me to work hard at my inner beauty.

Inner beauty is something that I’ve started to be asked to write about – and now I have that sinking feeling that perhaps that opportunity is another way God is closing in on me, prompting to realise that this is an area I need to work hard on. As a woman who has struggled with self-esteem a lot in the past (and still has great bouts of self-doubt) I can often overlook the work I need to do on my inner being as I am doing what so many in our culture (and others) do; focusing on the outer. Someone who has really challenged and inspired me in this whole area – and in being even more honest in my blog writing – is Emma Scrivener, whose brilliant blog can be found here.

I’m glad that I’m part of a Christian community that supports but also challenges me. While I was struggling earlier in the week with the realisation of how lonely leadership can be, I know too that that is part of the character changing process for me. Life can be hard enough that going on these particular journeys of self-discovery and change can seem so so uncomfortable – and downright unnecessary when they coincide with another big challenge! I have to constantly remind myself that it is only because God loves me that He touches those parts of me I’d rather He didn’t. When I started intentionally trying to draw closer to Him, to hear His voice more, I certainly didn’t expect the first thing for Him to say was ‘You need to work on being more gentle’ – but hey, looking back, I guess that was pretty naive wasn’t it?!