Where are you God?: Themes from The Stranger

I am delighted to welcome Joy Margetts to my blog today, with a guest piece that looks at the themes of her latest book: The Stranger. Joy is a fantastic writer: do check out all of her books. She wrote about the themes in her first book, The Healing, and her journey to getting it published on my website back in 2021 so it is wonderful to welcome her here again.

I wonder if you have ever asked: Where are you God? If we are honest, we have all been in that place of not sensing God’s presence. Perhaps that has been combined with the other big question, ‘Why God?’

Life is not always easy. Bad things happen – loss, grief, trauma, pain and sickness are all real. Sometimes when we are in the middle of the worst experiences of our lives, when we really need to feel God’s closeness, to hear his comforting voice, to know his peace, suddenly he seems incredibly far away.

A lonely journey

The Stranger tackles those themes. At the beginning of the story we meet Brother Silas, a man broken by life’s circumstances. The great service for God that he had poured everything into lies in ashes at his feet. Once a man full of faith, now he feels God’s absence and questions everything. He runs – from his home, his vocation, his faith and from God. The journey Silas takes is a lonely one, but there are glimmers of hope along the way, as he meets people that he finds connection with, as he experiences miraculous happenings, and as he reunites with an old acquaintance. As his physical journey comes to an end, as one of my reviewers put it, Silas rediscovers that the faith he thought he had lost, he had never really lost at all.

Drawing on personal experience for The Stranger

As in all of my fiction, in writing The Stranger, I was writing from my own experience. There was a season in my own life where everything suddenly changed. A sudden illness became a chronic condition and it robbed me of many things: a ministry role that I was flourishing in, a job that I loved, the joy of travel and discovering new things, being the wife and parent I wanted to be. I couldn’t understand why God had allowed it, especially as it came at a time in my life when I was contented and looking forward to the future with excitement. I begged him for healing, believing wholeheartedly that he would answer me. My loved ones prayed with faith, too, but nothing changed. I started to question everything, and soon hopelessness and despair took over. God seemed a million miles away – if he were there at all.

I had been a follower of Jesus all of my life. I had seen God do miraculous things, change people’s lives radically. I had experienced sweet times of feeling his tangible closeness, heard his voice speak clearly and yet in the time when I needed him most, I could not find him. The temptation to run, from everything I had ever believed in, was real.

Finding hope again

I was able to write The Stranger recently, some years later, because actually it is a story of hope. I think there are many reasons why we can struggle to hear God or feel his closeness. Fear, doubt, disappointment, anger, sin – these things can all create a barrier between us and our Father. Has he really left us when we needed him most? I don’t believe so. He promises in his Word, ‘I will never leave you nor forsake you’ (Hebrews 13:5, NKJV). My testimony is that of course he had not abandoned me. I could not trust my feelings, or my understanding during that traumatic time. I had to choose to believe his promises.

Like Brother Silas, God brought people into my life to demonstrate that he was real, and that he cared about me. He spoke through his Word, and eventually I began to hear the sweet whisper of his voice again, as I repented for building a case against him. In hindsight, I can look back at so many times when God was obviously there. 

My healing still hasn’t come fully. I still have some of the same struggles, but my God is faithful. He loves me, and he will work all things together for my good (Romans 8:28). I don’t have to understand what that looks like, I just have to trust him, and enjoy being loved by him.

In The Stranger I portray human brokenness, but I also write with understanding about a God who never leaves his beloved children. Even when they try to run, he will pursue them, gently and persistently, until they finally find themselves fully back in his embrace.

Joy Margetts loves writing and loves the Word of God. A retired nurse, mother and grandmother, she also has a lifelong interest in history. Her works of Christian historical fiction are inspired by her own faith journey, and set among the beautiful Welsh landscapes of her adoptive homeland.

Her books are available on her website , The Stranger can also be bought direct from the publisher  and all are widely available elsewhere online and through good bookshops.

The healing power of words

I am delighted to welcome Joy Margetts to my blog, to explain more about the painful yet healing personal story behind her new book The Healing.

I knew almost as soon as I began writing my novel that it was going to be called The Healing

A PEACEFUL ‘DOWNLOAD’

The story is a fictional tale. It had come to me, almost as a download, while I sat in the ruins of a Cistercian Abbey on a sunny summer day back in 2019. I was enjoying the deep peace and serenity of the moment, and wondering, in conversation with God, whether the abbey communities of the past had been places where some, at least, could have come and found healing for their souls. The answer I heard was a whispered ‘yes’. 

So the story came. A medieval knight, wounded physically, emotionally and spiritually, finds himself rescued from a French roadside ditch, by a kind Cistercian monk. In order to return to his homeland of Wales incognito, Philip de Braose, aided by his new friend, Brother Hywel, disguises himself as a monk. He finds himself on a journey where he not only becomes immersed in the Cistercian world, but also comes to terms with his pain, reconnects with the God he had long abandoned, and experiences a deep and profound healing: mind, body and soul. Philip then gets the opportunity to restart his life and live it the way God had always intended him to live it. A changed man with a renewed purpose.

MY OWN HEALING

My novel is a story of one man’s healing, but it is so much more. Because it is also my healing. I was able to write this book because it came straight out of my own experience. The truths that Hywel shares with Philip are the things I had to learn, and relearn, during one of the most painful times of my life. 

Eight years ago, I was happy with life. My children were reaching adulthood and beginning to fly the nest. I had a loving husband, a part-time job I loved, and I was actively involved in local church, with a God-given teaching ministry that I relished. Then out of the blue everything changed. I became ill with what was later diagnosed as ME (Chronic Fatigue Syndrome) and my world as I knew it was turned upside down. It was as if I hit a wall, emotionally and spiritually, and I could not find God in it at all.

The sense of betrayal was real. I had always trusted Him, and known His faithfulness throughout my life. I had suffered, and indeed experienced healing before. But this time I did not have the strength to fight, to even believe in His goodness any more. Despite how I felt, God had not abandoned me. He proved that by the loving people who surrounded me with their kindness, who prayed when I could not, and who spoke words of truth with love: healing words.

BELIEVING GOD’S WORDS

At the end of each chapter of The Healing are verses from scripture. Each one is special to me, because these are some of the words and promises that I was gently reminded of during that time. I had to make the choice to believe what God was saying, what His word was speaking into my soul. I had to chose to hope in His promises and believe that He was going to fulfil them in my life.

The word of God became my safe place, especially when my mind was under attack. Every day, I read what I could; those words gave me strength and God used them to do a healing work in me. Slowly and gently, graciously and lovingly, God restored my broken spirit, and my wounded soul. He also did a physical healing work in me that is still ongoing. Now I can live a much less restricted life. I can now teach. And I can write. I can again share words that hopefully will bring His healing.

In all of my affliction I find great comfort in your promises, for they have kept me alive!  (Psalm 119:50, TPT)

THE ROAD TO PUBLICATION

I did not set out to write a book for publication. I wrote a story that echoed my own. I found even the writing process a healing one. Remembering all the things that God had taught and reminded me of. Enjoying revisiting those hope-filled promises. And realising, with joyful amazement, just how far I had come. When I had finished writing, it was God I believe who prompted me to send it off to a publisher. That first publisher miraculously offered to publish and here we are now. I am an unexpected author of medieval fiction, and my first book is in print! 

My prayer for The Healing, is not only that people will enjoy reading Philip’s story, but that they will also find within the words of my novel kisses from a God who loves to heal.

The Lord is close to all whose hearts are crushed by pain, and he is always ready to restore the repentant one.       (Psalm 34:18 TPT)

Joy Margetts describes herself as ‘a fifty something mother of two grown children’ who lives on the beautiful North Wales Coast. The natural beauty and history of the area inspires her writing. The Healing will be published by Instant Apostle on 19 March 2021. Pre-publication, signed copies are available from the author at www.joymargetts.com