Tag: loneliness

Mental Health Awareness Week

It is Mental Heath Awareness Week and I just couldn’t let the week go by without posting. I want to firstly acknowledge that I have struggled with my mental health in the past. And, due to a mixture of grief, stress and perimenopause, know I am again now. While there is much less stigma surrounding this issue, I am heartbroken to see how stretched the services trying to support people’s mental health are. I am particularly aware of how much the pandemic has affected the mental health of our young people.

Being community

The theme of this year’s Mental Health Awareness Week is loneliness. With a teenager about to embark on GCSEs, I understand how the isolation of being home-based, studying, can cause feelings of loneliness. Young people need our prayers for their mental, emotional and physical wellbeing during this season.

There are so many others who face loneliness on a daily basis. As my husband takes time today to make some pastoral visits, I am reminded of how vital it is that we are in community. I realise it is more difficult with the fragmented, busy lives so many of us live in 21st-century cities. But the benefits far outweigh the costs – for all involved. Let’s pray for those, like our pastors, street pastors, food shop volunteers and other community workers as they reach out to the lonely. Let’s also think about ways that we can too.

It’s OK to ask for help

I know that when you are struggling it is natural to want to hide. It takes huge courage to reach out – and yet it is as we do so that we make human connection, which is so good for our wellbeing. We need to make it as easy as possible in our communities and churches for people to share their needs. Let’s work hard to cultivate safe spaces where people understand it is OK not to be OK – where no one feels judged but rather heard and supported.

Useful links for mental health awareness week

There have been some really helpful articles and posts during Mental Health Awareness Week. Here are a few useful links:

https://www.facebook.com/mindandsouluk The Mind and Soul Foundation have been posting really helpful advice on their Facebook page this week.

https://www.eauk.org/news-and-views/what-could-a-mental-health-friendly-church-look-like?fbclid=IwAR2ONmQJHnuGcf-Z_QaRkzLRT0QP9QyMDMfHwamAe2Wz2dnEhziecEcr_68 Rachael Newham from brilliant mental health charity Kintsugi Hope on how churches can be more supportive.

https://www.facebook.com/KintsugiHope Kintsugi Hope have also been posting tips for loneliness. Also included is a video from founder Patrick Regan on his own struggles, how he felt such shame to begin with but has come to understand that people with anxiety are some of the most courageous and faith-filled.

You can also find some links to helpful books here.

God’s eleventh hour timing

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Reflections based on Acts 12:1–19.

‘The night before Herod was to bring him to trial, Peter was sleeping … an angel of the Lord appeared …’ (vv.6–7)

Peter was awaiting trial by King Herod, knowing that his fellow disciple James had just been executed. But he wasn’t having an anxious, sleepless night. In spite of his chains and the guards around him, he was so soundly asleep that the angel we went to rescue him had to strike him to wake him up! At the eleventh hour, as believers are praying for him, Peter was miraculously freed from prison. 

You may have personally experienced God’s eleventh hour timing, in provision, healing or ‘deliverance’. I love the stories George Müller (who founded schools and orphanages in Bristol in the early 1800s) told about God’s provision. One such anecdote refers to him saying grace in front of the orphans he needed to feed. He had no food at all, but was expectant for God to move – and He did. While George was praying, the baker walked in with many loaves for them to eat.

But for all the stories of God’s incredible rescue, it is important to acknowledge that not all are healed or delivered from death. Many of the early Christians were martyred – as are many Christians still today. And, of course, thousands are dying right now at the hands of the current pandemic.

Corrie Ten Boom who, along with other family members, helped many Jews escape the Nazis from the Holocaust during World War II by hiding them in her home, was herself imprisoned in Ravensbrück concentration camp (the same camp in which her sister Betsie died). In a letter, Corrie retold an incident from her childhood:

‘When I was a little girl, I went to my father and said, “Daddy, I am afraid that I will never be strong enough to be a martyr for Jesus Christ.” “Tell me,” said Father, “When you take a train trip … when do I give you the money for the ticket? Three weeks before?” “No, Daddy, you give me the money … just before we get on the train.” “That is right,” my father said, “and so it is with God’s strength. Our Father in Heaven knows when you will need the strength … He will supply all you need just in time.”’*

May God uphold you with the strength and wisdom that you need in this time of nationwide lockdown. May you know His love and care in the moments when you feel scared or alone – and may you sense when He wants you to reach out to others; perhaps through a text or video call.

*From a letter written by Corrie Ten Boom in 1974.

Prayer: Lord, when I’m facing difficult situations help me to trust that You’ll be there ‘just in time’ – to heal me, provide for me, deliver me or give me all the strength I need (even if it is at the eleventh hour). I want to pray now for our nation during this time of lockdown; that fear and loneliness will not take root, and that Your Church will find creative ways to reach out. May we be Your hands and feet, even when we can’t physically visit others. Be with those who may be struggling with the isolation; may they reach out to You and come to know You as their loving Father and powerful saviour. Amen.

In the Garden…

Garden-of-Gethsemane-Jerusalem

In Matthew 26, Mark 14 and Luke 22 we have similar accounts of Jesus in the Garden of Gethsemane. His heart is heavy – he describes it as ‘overwhelmed with sorrow’. He needs some time with his father, but also wants his friends to stay nearby.

Just imagine the intensity of emotions Jesus is wrestling with now. They reach their peak where he cries out, ‘Abba Father…everything is possible for you. Take this cup from me’. I can sense some panic in the human voice Jesus uses – and yet his spiritual being still submits, ‘yet not my will, but yours be done’. Luke’s account indicates that once he submitted in this way an angel appeared and ‘strengthened’ him. But, even after this visitation, the anguish was still upon him, his prayer intensified and his sweat became like ‘drops of blood’.

Matthew’s account reveals how Jesus went back to his friends – presumably for support and to check they were praying for him. Three times he went to them… and each time found them asleep. It seems they hadn’t grasped the enormity of the situation, and so allowed tiredness to overtake them. He must have felt so let down and alone.

I can’t begin to compare our own situations with Jesus’, but I do know there are times when we are overwhelmed with loneliness, sadness and despair. Perhaps your friends have let you down – by not doing something or by acting in a way that hurt you. Perhaps God is asking you to face a situation you feel is too difficult – why would he ask it of you? How do you respond – to your friends, and to God? I think Jesus is modelling the most helpful response to us in the Garden – pour it all out to God in prayer; the hurt, despair, pain, sadness. At the end he then says, ‘Rise, let us go!’ He uses his time in prayer to be real about his emotional tussle, then meets the situation head on.

One thing to try if you have been hurt or feel overwhelmed is to write a letter (to God or the friend). Express all your emotions as you do this. Sometimes it is necessary to speak to the person, in which case the letter can be a good way to vent your intense feelings before working out the best way to approach a meeting with grace. At other times it is simply right to bring the letter before God, read it out and then tear it up, asking him to take away the pain as you do so – or to enable you to face the difficult situation with his help.

This reflection first appeared in Quite Spaces.

‘In the run up to Easter, I keep thinking about how Jesus was totally betrayed by one close to him – with a kiss. What was going through Judas’ mind? How could he actually do what he did?’ This is an extract from my latest piece for Christian Today, which looks at how the Bible can help us when we are not sure who to trust. To read more, please click here.