Hope for the hurting

I am delighted to welcome Liz Carter onto my blog today. Her beautiful new book, Treasure in Dark Places: Stories and Poems of Hope in the Hurtingwhich I had the joy of endorsing, is out today. I am thrilled that she agreed to share a little about the writing process and what life was like for her while she was writing it. Like the experience I had while writing my latest devotional, Liz was, at times, in deep despair and isolation when putting this book together. Wrestling with our own circumstances, looking to the Bible and trying to find some sort of sense for ourselves but also to bring hope to others is at the heart of much of the writing we both do. She is such a talented writer, weaving honest reflections with thought-provoking imagery. I commend her book to you wholeheartedly – it would make a wonderful Christmas present. I would definitely describe it as ‘hope for the hurting’. Here are her answers to a few questions I posed to her.

Tell me about the writing process during the isolation of shielding

When I first received the shielding letter back in March, I was shocked and fearful, the words ‘at risk of severe illness’ pounding through my mind. When I began to get into the swing of shielding, though, I thought I had it sorted, I thought I had a plan: I would finish the book I’d been working on for a while, a book about our identity in Jesus and God’s back-to-front kingdom. I told myself shielding wouldn’t be a huge issue because I was used to being isolated at home for long periods when ill with my lifelong lung condition. But I simply didn’t take into account the mental toll the whole thing would take, and how being separated from my family would send me into some dark days and darker nights. It felt as if the words were slipping away, as if this was not going to plan. It was as if a door was slammed in my face and I broke into pieces, already battered by isolation

Then I started to write some poetry about the pandemic and about the darkness I found myself in. I’d written so much before about living in physical pain, but this time the pain went further into my mind and the words began to flow in the most unexpected direction. At around the same time a couple of friends suggested I collected together some of the stories and poems from my website into a book, and so the idea for Treasure in Dark Places was born – and then grew so much wider, with mostly new material written over the painful time of shielding.

Was writing this new book a form of lament for you at times? 

Definitely. I found that words were pouring out that seemed almost too sharp, too vulnerable, too real at times, and they were words of lament. They were words that were birthed in struggle and that sat there in the pit with me, like the words of so many of the Psalmists who were never afraid to lay out their stark agony before God. Many of these Psalms have been a huge help to me over years of living with pain, and their words spoke even more deeply to me over these months, with their honest agony and their call to remember and to praise within the storm. 

I think that as Christians we often forget how to lament, or even feel that lament should not be given a place in our prayer lives or in our corporate worship. We’ve somehow inherited the twisted idea that we should only, ever, be living in great joy, unaffected by the sadness around us, in a kind of damaging triumphalism that leads us to feel as though we are letting God down when we turn to sadness, anger or other big emotions. But the Bible gives us permission to express those things in big loud voices, to shout out our pain, to cry out our struggle, to weep at the feet of Jesus when it all gets too much. For me, my writing this summer was a long lament and a choice to turn to God in the midst of it, so some of the poems in the book are more melancholic, and others turn more quickly to hope.

Treasure in dark places - hope for the hurting

How different was it to write the poetry and imaginative prose sections?

I found that in many of my stories I turned to poetic devices and phrases within the text at times, in order to echo the poetry. The main difference is that with the stories I needed to stop and consider the form, the overall framework and the beginning, middle and end – not so much to plan in depth, but to take more time to shape the piece. However, with the poems, they were more free-falling, the words hitting the page where they wished to and generally staying there in some form. Some of the poems are written in rhyme or with rhyming elements, and this took more thinking about, but they were generally born out of words that tumbled out rather than any great planning on my part!Writing poetry and short stories is very different in terms of how I approach the piece, yet in this book both come from a deep place of hope, the hope God imbues me with even when it hurts.

What do you want readers to get from spending time with your new book?

My prayer is that readers will get a glimpse of the hope we find in Jesus through these pieces, that they will unearth the treasures that are sometimes only to be found in the deepest darkness. I want readers to know they are not alone in their struggle, that it is okay to struggle as a Christian and that they are not somehow failing God or anybody else when life is tough. My poems and prose ultimately point to Jesus, who went through the very worst of suffering and understands our pain more than anyone else ever could, and so stands with us within our darkness, allowing his light to puncture through and flood us in his incomparable love.

PS Liz and I are both part of the Association of Christian Writers, and both write monthly posts for their More than Writers blog. Liz wrote one about how she was feeling on the eve of publication day, and I wrote one suggesting ways we can support one another as writers. Do take a look if you are interested.

Liz Carter is an author and poet who writes about finding gold in the mess of life. She lives with long-term lung disease and has written Catching Contentment: How to be Holy Satisfied (IVP) and an accompanying study course. Her new book, Treasure in Dark Places: Stories and poems of hope in the hurtingis out now and available in paperback or ebook at online stores.

I will yet praise Him

Reflections based on Psalm 25:1–7; 33:18–22.

‘Guide me in your truth and teach me, for you are God my Saviour, and my hope is in you all day long.’ (Ps. 25:5)

I love the psalms. Their passion – and their total honesty. They reveal the struggles the authors had with their personal circumstances and how, at times, they literally had to talk to their souls: ‘Why, my soul, are you downcast? … Put your hope in God, for I will yet praise him, my Saviour and my God.’ (Ps.43:5).

I find refreshment when I turn to the psalms, because they give me hope. Even when I am feeling surrounded or simply low, there is usually a psalm that articulates how I am feeling. But it doesn’t allow me to wallow, as it usually then turns my thoughts to God. 

Have you ever noticed how many times the word ‘hope’ appears in the psalms? It occurs 38 times in Psalm 119 alone! The key to the effectiveness of the psalms is, I believe, the way they are honest but don’t stay there. They turn their gaze heavenwards and allow the truth to bring fresh hope.

If you have never written your own psalm, why not try writing one today? Bring your troubles to God, but also remember to speak His truths and declare ‘I will yet praise Him’.

Optional further reading: Psalm 42, Psalm 119, Psalm 146.

Fighting despair

Reflections based on 1 Samuel 22:1–6; Psalm 142.

Reading in Samuel, we discover that David is running from Saul and takes refuge in a cave. He had already been anointed king by Samuel at this point, but the current king was not ready to give up his throne. It is interesting to see how God allowed David to go through this time of testing. He didn’t simply triumphantly walk onto the throne: God worked on his character through these testing times.

David wrote a few of the psalms while hiding from Saul. In Psalm 142 he is totally overwhelmed and desperate. He believes no one cares about him. And yet, even in the depths of despair, he turns to God. He tells Him how he feels. This might seem shocking – he says to God ‘no-one is concerned for me’ when obviously deep down he knows that God is. But I believe this psalm is important because it shows us that God wants us to be honest with him, in the way that David is here. Notice that he does turn things around though, and it is when he remembers where his hope lies that things change for him. As we see in verse 2 of our Samuel passage, God brings 400 men to him who form the start of his army. While he may feel he is hiding away, God is giving him an opportunity to work on both his own character and the development of leadership skills to run an army.

How do you respond when the heat is turned up in your life? Do you have a tendency to wallow in self-pity? If so, try to articulate that to God rather than keeping it inside and dwelling on it. Then remind yourself that He is the only real source of strength and hope.

I have found that I can have a tendency to get stuck in negative emotions. Learning how to lament, using the psalms as guides, has been an incredibly helpful form of release. I try and articulate all of my emotions through writing them down, and then remember God’s faithfulness to me in the same way.

For prayer and reflection: I am sorry Lord when I hide away from You, too low even to speak. Help me to lift my eyes to You, be honest about how I feel but also remember that You are my hope.

A thankfulness psalm

give thanks to the Lord

This series on thankfulness is going to be a little different to the other blog series I have written, as I’ve prepared some creative ideas for us to utilise. Today’s focus is on spending time drawing out meaning from a range of scriptures that talk about showing thanksgiving towards God. I’ve put some scriptures below to get you started, but do take the opportunity to search the Bible for other verses you may like to use too. Try to become aware of your own personal response to the words as you read them, writing down how you feel and what bubbles up inside you as you read.

Let us come into his presence with thanksgiving; let us make a joyful noise to him with songs of praise! Psalm 95:2

Give thanks to the Lord of lords, for his steadfast love endures forever.
Psalm 136:3

Giving thanks always and for everything to God the Father in the name of our Lord Jesus Christ. Ephesians 5:20

For everything created by God is good, and nothing is to be rejected if it is received with thanksgiving. 1 Timothy 4:4

Give thanks to the LORD, call upon his name, make known his deeds among the peoples,
 proclaim that his name is exalted. Isaiah 12:4

But thanks be to God! He gives us the victory through our Lord Jesus Christ. 
1 Corinthians 15:57

I often find that writing my own ‘thankfulness psalm’ or song after I have been reading scripture really helps me to express my own personal response to God. If you want to, why not trying writing your own today? You could start from scratch, or put all the response sentences that you’ve written together to create it.

Encouraging yourself in God

 

Reflections based on 1 Samuel 30.

‘David was greatly distressed because the men were talking of stoning him; each one was bitter in spirit because of his sons and daughters. But David found strength in the Lord his God.’

Encouragement gives us fresh hope, as well as the courage to carry on. David is a great biblical character to show us how to find encouragement in God. At this point in his story (covered by chapters 27, 29 and 30), he had decided to escape King Saul’s pursuit of him and went to live within the Philistines’ land. He ended up serving a Philistine king, which must have been bizarre for them all (as he had previously killed the Philistine giant Goliath)! Indeed, not all of the king’s men accept him and eventually David and his men are sent back to Ziklag, where their wives and children were. While they had been away, Amalekites had raided and taken their women and children captive.

At this point, David’s men begin to turn on him. What was David’s response? He didn’t despair, run or try to plead with them; we are told he ‘found strength in the Lord’ and then asked for the ephod so he could ask God what to do. How did he encourage himself in God? It isn’t spelt out in scripture but, given what is revealed about him in the psalms he penned, I think he probably brought to mind past examples of God’s faithfulness and stood firm on God’s promises. A look through psalms 34–41, for example, shows that David wasn’t afraid to be honest about his circumstances and emotions, and yet he always turned to praise, reminding himself how trustworthy and faithful God is. I love the tone of Psalm 37 – it is as if David is revealing what he has learned over the years: ‘I was young and now I am old, yet I have never seen the righteous forsaken’ (v25). In other psalms he tells his downcast soul to look to God. I think we can learn a lot about how to encourage ourselves through reading the psalms he penned.

Meditation: Spend some time thinking about ways that you can encourage yourself in God today.

Worshipping through suffering

general-background

Reflections based on Acts 16:16–38.

‘After they had been severely flogged, they were thrown into prison, and the jailor was commanded to guard them carefully… About midnight Paul and Silas were praying and singing hymns to God.’

One of the Christian women I admire most is my mum. She suffers from lupus and also has rheumatoid arthritis. She finds it hard to breathe and is in constant pain. But nothing makes her faith waver – it may dwindle to a tiny flicker at times but it is always there. I find that incredible. So I don’t write about this subject lightly.

Imagine how much Paul and Silas must have been suffering, and yet they choose to praise God despite their circumstances. The result: their chains were loosed; they showed integrity to the jailer by not running away and led his whole family to the Lord. I’m not saying there will always be such a positive outcome to your pain – just that there could be. My mum has been to hospital countless times, and is usually desperate not to go in. Yet often she testifies to some ‘God-incidence’ where she was able to share with someone who was dying or suffering badly. Each time she is able to say that if she was admitted simply to speak to that person the pain was worth it. Wow. I wish I could lift my head above my circumstances more often. That is what I think the crux of the matter is. It’s a choice we make – to look at our circumstances and the physical reality and allow ourselves to slide downwards, or to acknowledge the suffering, but also choose to remember God’s sovereignty doesn’t change in the light of it.

God knows how you are feeling so be honest – but don’t stay there. The Psalms are made up of 70% laments; take a look at some. Note how, even in the depths of despair, the writers lift their eyes heavenward, speaking out truths of His greatness. For your own sake, ask God to help you learn to do the same.

Prayer: Use what Habakkuk said, even in the light of impending starvation and devastation, as a starting point for your own prayer: ‘yet I will rejoice in the Lord, I will be joyful in God my saviour’. (Habakkuk 3:18)

God reveals; we respond

sky-and-sun

‘The heavens declare the glory of God; the skies proclaim the work of his hands. Day after day they pour forth speech; night after night they reveal knowledge.’

Reflections based on Psalm 19:1–11

Going back through the books I have on worship, I was struck once more by how many of them focused on worship as a response to what we know about God. This makes so much sense as it is only out of revelation that we can make a heartfelt response. And yet how often do we try and worship out of a dry and unfed bank of revelation? One writer simply suggested that if we aren’t very good at worshipping it’s because we don’t know our God very well. Ouch. I know there are seasons in which worshipping is harder, and we will look at that specifically later on, but there is a basic truth to what they said.

So where should we go to find out more about God? His Word is the obvious place and a great starting point is the psalms, such as the one we’ve read today. It’s there that we learn of the absolute awesomeness of God and yet, more than that, are reminded that He knows even the number of hairs on our heads and wants a personal relationship with us. What incredible truths!

Spend some time soaking those truths in. The more science discovers about the universe the more we can be in awe of the God who, as Graham Kendrick’s song ‘The Servant King’ so beautifully describes, ‘flung the stars into space’*. And yet He also knows every intimate detail of our lives and wants to spend time with us.

I love the way that Psalm 19 paints such a vivid picture of how God’s own creation literally pulsates with the truth about Him – that everything reveals His glory. It also reveals how God’s laws and commands are ordered and right. That to me shows His care for humanity.

Meditation: Sit quietly and write down some of the things this psalm reveals to you about God. Try and write a response in the form of a prayer, thank you letter, psalm or song.

*Graham Kendrick Copyright © 1983 Thankyou Music/Adm. by Capitol CMG Publishing worldwide excl. UK & Europe, adm. by Integritymusic.com, a division of David C Cook songs@integritymusic.com Used by Permission.