Tag: supporting one another

Time to be honest

‘Two are better than one, because they have a good return for their labour:  If either of them falls down, one can help the other up’ (Ecclesiastes 4:9–10).

Today I have enjoyed my monthly catch up with three other writers. We take time out to ask each other how we are generally, and how our writing is going. There was a common theme in our conversation, which I have noticed with other interactions I’ve had in recent days – we’ve had good days and bad days.

It was a breath of fresh air for me, as I have had a little run of harder days. We each need to remind ourselves that we all have our ups and downs, rather than feeling like a failure on the down days.

Particularly during this time of ongoing crisis, which continues alongside the monotony of being stuck indoors, there are days when we just don’t seem ourselves. It is OK to admit that – both to ourselves and to others.

I love the sense of being there for one another when we fall down, which is described so well in the Ecclesiastes verses. Last week I had what I would describe as a complete meltdown – everything seemed too much: work, family, church, relationships. I felt like I was totally spent and yet was still being pulled in every different direction possible.

Firstly, I needed to voice how I felt to God, and then to my husband. That helped. But I had a catch up chat booked in the same night with my close friends, and I struggled to decide whether I should share the same information with them, as they are in the church we lead. And yet, as soon as I did, I felt something lift.

Afterwards, I worried that I had overburdened them, although we had each shared honestly about our struggles as well as our joys. But I hadn’t. It highlighted to me, once again, that we are meant to live in relationship with others. We need each other, and in this time of isolation we need to find ways to be honest with those we trust about how we are coping, or not coping.

When one of us feels like we have fallen down, those around us can hold out a metaphorical hand to pull us back up. And we can do the same back to our friends when they need help and encouragement. Let’s not be too proud, ashamed or fearful to be honest with the people we trust. While it might be more difficult in this time of social distancing, we can still find ways to support one another.

Prayer: Thank You Lord that You have created us for relationship. Help me to remember that You long for me to be honest with You, but also that my friends and family are often Your hands and feet, helping to support me in practical ways. Help me to be the same for them, even during this challenging time.

Hope within the body of Christ

Reflections based on Ephesians 4:1–16.

‘There is one body and one Spirit, just as you were called to one hope when you were called’ (v.4)

I find this reminder of our one hope really interesting – and encouraging. It comes under a subheading ‘Unity and maturity in the body of Christ’ and here we are urged to live lives ‘worthy of the calling’ and are given a wonderful picture of how the body of Christ should work. Supporting one another, building each other up and each playing the part that God gave specifically to us…

Paul is obviously very aware of how differences between people can niggle and eventually erode the unity of the Church, so he begins by reminding us that there is only one body, and one Spirit – just as there is but one hope.

As we looked at last week, that hope is open to everyone who chooses to believe. That means our churches are going to be full of people that are very different to us! How do we learn not to just live with them, but appreciate those who may have different viewpoints and giftings to us? Well I think ensuring we keep the ‘main thing the main thing’, as a speaker I heard once said, is a pretty important part of that.

If we keep our focus on the fact that we, totally undeserving sinners, were offered unmerited favour by our God, through Jesus Christ, then we can look at others through the eyes of humility and love. But also with a heart of celebration – God has given each one of us this hope! And exuding that future hope, no matter what our circumstances (and possibly personal differences), is something that only the Church can do.

Let’s ‘grow up’, shape up and show the world that we certainly do have something that unites us all!

For prayer and reflection: Thank you God that you love me – but that you also love the people I find most difficult in church. Help us to learn to celebrate that each of us is different.

Be each other’s fan club!

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‘Do not let any unwholesome talk come out of your mouths, but only what is helpful for building others up according to their needs, that it may benefit those who listen.’

Reflections based on Ephesians 4:1–29.

This chapter in Paul’s letter to the Ephesians is focused on unity, and every believer playing the part that God has called them to. It follows on from our last devotional reading about putting off the old self and living in the way of the Spirit. It is interesting that verse 29 zeros in on our speech and how we should use it intentionally for the building up of those around us. We certainly need the encouragement of one another – perhaps more so than at any other time in history. There are more people suffering from depression than ever before – 85,000 deaths worldwide occur each year due to depression. We each desperately need people who are rooting for us.

Dr Gary Chapman, renowned marriage counsellor and the author of the bestselling The Five Love Languages, recognises how much difference it makes in a person’s life. Indeed, in his book The Family You’ve Always Wanted he says, ‘‘From the smallest child to the oldest adult, when our fan club applauds us, we try harder.’

We do have a responsibility to live as children of God, not by our old sinful nature. We don’t have to strive to do it in our own strength, though, as we have the Holy Spirit’s help. This chapter reminds us that we are grafted into God’s family too, with his Son at the head. Verse 16 says that, ‘From him the whole body, joined and held together by every supporting ligament, grows and builds itself up in love…’ Note the imagery: we each make up a part of the supporting framework of the body. We need one another’s support and encouragement. We are not meant to journey in this life alone, but alongside others who will spur us on to be the best we can be.

Reflection: Do you have those in your life that encourage you? If so, find a way to thank them today. If not, ask God to bring encouragers into your life. Look out for ways you can encourage others today too.